Faith No More Drops The Mask
Faith No More is gearing up for a yearlong tour to promote its latest album, Album Of The Year, which is released this week. This record is almost a miracle baby, recorded over the past year whenever the disparate parts of the band could all find time to be in San Francisco at the same time. But there is none of that catch-as-catch-can quality about this record, despite keyboardist Roddy Bottum's spending most of the year touring with his side band, Imperial Teen; Mike Patton's repeated outings with his first band, Mr. Bungle, and appearances with John Zorn; and drummer Mike "Puffy" Bordin's tour of duty playing with Ozzy Osbourne.
Most of the band assembled last week and jetted into London to appear on Top Of The Pops - everyone except Bordin, who is performing in OzzFest. Undaunted, FNM hired a local UK drummer to fill in, but made him wear a "Puffy" mask - basically because the group didn't want anyone to think Bordin was out of the band. It seemed like a perfect solution until the hired stand-in balked. As everyone knows, drummers are a volatile bunch, and this one was overheard telling pals that he wasn't going to wear the mask. When Patton confronted him (which is a scary thing in itself), the drummer blanched, but agreed to behave. That was until the band was five bars into "Ashes To Ashes," and then somehow the mask "accidentally" slipped off. Right on camera, our English brethren got to witness Patton extending the offender a rather rude gesture.
But that's nothing compared to what Patton almost did to Bruce Willis when the band was at the Cannes Film Festival last month. FNM was invited to appear on a French TV show as one of the featured acts. One minute the San Francisco band was playing on the beach in a scene right out of Help, and the next it was getting the bum's rush, being ordered off the premises by the gendarmes because a platinum-and-pretentious Bruce Willis was arriving in a private yacht, and his handlers demanded that the area be cleared.
FNM was hustled into a cabin and made to stand away from the windows for "security" reasons. Adding insult to injury, the authorities sequestered our guys in the cabin for more than an hour - and wouldn't even allow them out for bathroom breaks.
Well, you don't tell Mike Patton he can't exercise his right to use the facilities. This is a guy who was known to defecate onstage in Europe. After a while, he leaped up, said "fuck it," and strode boldly through the room in which Willis was holding court, with the cheers of his band's members echoing in his ears. Willis looking visibly pissed - lucky for him they weren't curtailing his bathroom privileges.
The entertainment aspect of the day didn't end there. After the band members were finally allowed out of their holding pen, they prepared to run through a soundcheck, when they spied none other than Michael Jackson standing on a nearby balcony waving at the crowds below. As a tribute to the deposed King of Pop, Faith No More soundchecked to "Bad," which probably would have been fine, except they substituted some lascivious lyrics for the real words.
"Courtesy of Microsoft(r) Music Central(tm)--http://musiccentral.msn.com"
Thanks to Jason "Toast" McDonald